Right Now

Right now things are alright. They are actually pretty good. The point is that lately I have been able to be alive and in each day and it has been amazing. Last Thursday I picked Claire up with a giant grin on her face. Her aide told me about the wheelchair races that Claire is having with the 1st graders from her reg. ed class. She loves racing and honestly, I am not at all surprised. We went off to a fun pt session and the girls were both in good spirits so I gambled. Instead of going home to have nap time we first went downtown to the bookstore. I had gone the day before with Chloe and she fell in love with an Olivia book. So we went back to get it on the premise that she had to share it with Claire. As we stood in line to pay the woman behind us remarked that Claire seemed very in tune to the music. She had noticed that Claire was doing her hands along to the tune of the violin that was being played outside. I watched and sure enough she was right. After we purchased out new little jewel we wandered outside and basked in the sun and soaked in the lovely sounds of the violin.  As Chloe went and dropped a dollar in his case I couldn’t help but be overwhelmed by the goodness of my life. It isn’t anything extraordinary. It is picking tomatoes, going to book shops and taking walks be the ocean. Right now it is all in balance. I have learned enough to know that it won’t always be like this. Claire has developed a little cough and I know that a pneumonia might very well be on the horizon. Part of me thinks practically, that short of a nebulizer and a humidifier there isn’t much that can be done. But there is more. I can enjoy each day for what it is. I just wanted to say that out loud and post it for the day in my future that I don’t want to be in the present. To my future self, remember that when it is harder than you can handle, soon it will be more wonderful than you can imagine, hold on.

One thought on “Right Now

  1. I love moments like that, when all is well and you can just appreciate each good thing that's happening. Those moments are even better because they're so hard-won. But without Rett syndrome, I might not notice them.

    Very interesting to hear about Claire and the violin – I must pay attention to whether Amy does that too, as she really does love music.

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